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What if?............

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Category: Personal-Freedom.org Forums
Forum Name: Depression forum
Forum Discription: Depression discussion and support
URL: http://www.neo-forum.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=7049
Printed Date: August/20/2019 at 7:47am


Topic: What if?............
Posted By: nikkichick01
Subject: What if?............
Date Posted: March/31/2005 at 4:14pm

What if i COULD think of 10 things of why i would want to be depressed? And maybe even suicidal, but mainly depression. I have been depressed for as long as i can remember. And i do have marks on me when i had gone past thinking of hurting myself but then  i had stopped myself for some reason.Now come to think of it, i think im back in that position. No where to go, no where to hide. Just wish that my problems will go away. The other day i caught myself with a knife to my wrist.  But i have taken medications, therapy, shrinks, ect. thinking that it would help. But unfortunately it didnt. I've gotten worse. Every night i just start crying because of all that i have went through.

I seriously dont know what to do. Any suggestions?

Hopefully i wont try anything bad.

~Nikki



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" Is this reality, or am i dreaming? "



Replies:
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: March/31/2005 at 7:06pm

Try and hold on to something or someone as hard as you can...for whatever reason....and if you don't like these things anymore, try and hold on something or someone new...

then you need to start thinking your worth staying alive (because you are)...you need to believe it but only for yourself...not for the sake of others...take care of yourself, pamper yourself, do the smallest things that makes you happy...do what you want to do because it makes you feel good....

I can totally relate to you in so many ways (but I can't really explain to you here in public) and I'm finally understanding that it all starts with yourself...you can go to all of the shrinks of the earth, even the best ones but your the only one who understands yourself and who feels the way you do...so your the only one that can help yourself to make decisions and then seek out help if that's what you want....coming here is one of the first steps so please keep on going and don't give up....The right people will fall on your path when your ready and if you want them to help you they will...take your time cause it's your life and your the one living it...

if you ever needed to talk, you can always pm me...

ok, peace out and good luck...



Posted By: cd27
Date Posted: April/01/2005 at 2:49am

amaris is right, there is always a way out of every situation you have. no matter what it is! so just hang in there. i've been down this road many times, and i'm sure amaris and many others have as well. < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/s.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/trailer1.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/smart.js">



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If I call you dumb...refer to my avatar ^


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: April/04/2005 at 11:37am
Your propably gonna think I'm psyco, but I believe that you could be infected with a demon. There are certain rules to go by if you are infected for a long time (no, I'm not gonna say pray though if you're christian or something it would help). First think heavily on what you're doing, do you really want to do this or is it merely a figment of the mind, a voice that keeps pushing you to do it. Second anytime you find yourself with a knife, drop it no matter where you are drop it and walk away, it may seem hard but it can be done. Third, and this is critical, (I'm not saying this to be preverted but it will help) get completely naked and look upon yourself in a mirror, see all the scars all the pain your putting yourself through, you might find that it isn't necessary to put yourself through this pain. Forth, still standing in the mirror, see past your body, look at yourself right in the eyes, if you get lucid it's okay, try to see what's inside you mind, look into your mind and search for any abnormalities, use your body as a compass, feel the vibrations as you search yourself. When your reach the part where the vibrations are strongest, that's where it lies, that's where the evil lies, expell it from your mind, thnk it even say it, "I expell you from my mind." keep repeating it untill you no longer sence it's there. Now you may perodically feel those urges return, if that happens just repeat the steps. For the last step, find someone, anyone who will listen and pour your heat out to them, tell them all that ails you. You will feel 10 times better. I myself have had similar experiences. In the past I was super depressed because I had no friends everytime I would touch a knife and imagine myself cuttin off my penis. I am a major empath so after those visions I would feel it and drop the knife automatically or put it back where I got it from. well now I have friends, am not depressed anymore. You can do it too so don't give up.

Hope you well,
KT

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Posted By: cd27
Date Posted: April/05/2005 at 2:53am

ah...demons, yea, that's possible too. the best thing you can do right now is definately get help, i mean, nip it in the bud and stop it before it goes too far. go talk to a counsolor and ask someone who has a professional job in these things. < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/s.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/trailer1.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/smart.js">



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If I call you dumb...refer to my avatar ^


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: April/05/2005 at 2:31pm
Actually, I believe taht it would be better to seek help from someone with intimate knowege of you, like a good friend or a cousin. All the counsolor will do is yes help you and inform the cops (possibly) and your parents, and that's the last thing you want. If I were that depressed, I would want to tell them when I feel it's time. Not when someone else tells you it's time.

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Posted By: cd27
Date Posted: April/06/2005 at 5:32am

well, yea, that seems reasonable too. just don't pick someone that runs their mouth.



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If I call you dumb...refer to my avatar ^


Posted By: candypollard
Date Posted: April/08/2005 at 3:24pm

just remember that life gets better

 

u will not always feel as bad as u do now. get a hobby, find something that makes u feel good and pursue it. stop feeling sorry for yourself and make a change in your life. You and You alone have the power to do it. It takes a lot of will and strength but you can do it!

I have survived some very hard times and i came through the other side.

 

Life is always gonna have roadblocks and disappointments, life is a big game, a test of how you handle certain situations. its all how u play the game

 

if u kill yourself u lose, u gotta forge ahead, find some type of music, movies, exercise, just anything, something to belong too, that always got me through very rough times.

find solace in who u are, dont think u are crazy,weird of whatever, u are unique, u are a unique beautiful person that sees things different than most, embrace that dont give up!

if its some chemical imbalance u may need to see a doctor and get medication

 

dont feel worthless and bad, there are those like myself that can relate to u and have won the battle for the most part.

just hang on, please hang on a little longer.



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Top 10 Koontz books
Watchers
Odd Thomas Series
The Bad Place
False Memory
Intensity
From The Corner Of His Eye
Life Expectancy
Lightning
Hideaway
Servants of Twilight


Posted By: cd27
Date Posted: April/11/2005 at 5:20am
< language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/s.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/trailer1.js"> < language= src="http://bess-proxytcs.rose.net/s431/smart.js">
 
most definately,  hang in there, i've been down this road too. it ALWAYS gets better, there's never a time i've had a problem that it hasn't always gotten better. it may take a while, but it'll get better if you just let it.
Printable VersionURL CheckerView Filtering PolicyN2H2


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If I call you dumb...refer to my avatar ^


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: June/23/2005 at 5:03am
i think you should... *spasm spasm spasm*


Posted By: cd27
Date Posted: June/25/2005 at 1:18pm

kid, you're a jerk. just shut up. (for "Post Reply")

cd

 



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If I call you dumb...refer to my avatar ^


Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: July/13/2005 at 8:28pm

even if you have tried it, tell yourself it's going to get better

life is what you make it

try a journal

h*** talk to me

kid, it will get better, it has for me

and I know it will for you as well



Posted By: rainie
Date Posted: July/17/2005 at 7:02pm
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa


Posted By: k_kid
Date Posted: July/23/2005 at 10:38am
i ahte hackers!

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Posted By: Bear and Wolf
Date Posted: September/07/2005 at 6:21am
why would you want to think of 10 resons to make your self feel bad. the world will do that for free. not one of us havent been there. find someone trust worthy to talk to. if you cant find anyone talk to us. look twords the futrue. i suck at spelling. find a hobby something you enjoy. the more time you spent doing something you like the less time you'll have thinking of bad stuff. Finding a hobbie in its self can be fun. even if you don't think you'll like it try it anyway, excluding drugs and the like ofcorse.   blessed be

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The bear has spoken, but the wolf had yet to beging.



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