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FinalExam
Guru Joined: February/08/2007 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 8753 |
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Okay, read it. A very solid and intriguing concept. I liked the patrons sitting around discussing time travel. I would say the story needs a good polish, as far as grammar and tightening it up. Also I thought the ending could have been expanded. For your very first story, an impressive effort.
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We are not strangers to ourselves, we only try to be. --Odd Thomas by Dean Koontz
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christophersnow
Guru "Snowballman" Joined: February/01/2004 Status: Offline Points: 11195 |
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I was thinking about this, because I love all of the references, but you never see this happen in big time published books. Is it OK to make all these references, or do publishers not allow this for copyright reasons?
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"It had to be said. The world is perishing from an orgy of self-sacrificing." - Howard Roark
Dean Koontz= Always working! |
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Oddy
Guru Joined: December/17/2006 Status: Offline Points: 1302 |
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I think Koontz makes plenty of references such as Harry Potter. If anything, it's free advertising. |
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"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious"
~Michael Scott in The Office |
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Paolo Macachor
Guru Joined: June/05/2006 Status: Offline Points: 1756 |
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Very entertaining haha... Has some spoilers for LIGHTNING though.
And Emma Roberts is cute! She has a movie this year I think it's called "Wild Child". Loved her prissiness in Nancy Drew. |
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dnurse64
Guru Joined: July/29/2008 Status: Offline Points: 1976 |
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Awesome! I enjoyed the whole story. When is the next chapter? I didn't even know this part of the forum existed.
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I'm inclined to believe in parallel worlds filled with dark bound Snow and Odd adventures.
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